Included
What you get, that you weren't expecting.
The story of my work is in the parts you do not have to ask for. A box of warmth in January. A wasp vial in July. Oxygen at seven thousand feet. A ceremony built like a piece of architecture so the emotion lands when you need it to.
The ceremony itself
- Ceremony as lesson plan
- Three virtues, three blessings, three promises. Cards passed between you so emotion has pacing. A pause and a breath where you need one. This part is invisible to your guests; you will feel it in your chest.
- The legal layer
- Marriage license, witness signatures, a copy filed for you. I have done this enough times that the paperwork is the part you will think about least.
The materials
- Materials gathered for you
- I begin gathering before we have even spoken — driftwood from the north fork, copper from a school built in 1908, beetle wings for a veil, sandstone from my own property for a ring box. I notice when something is for someone before they have arrived. There are no accidents.
For cold weather
- The cold-as-hell box
- A labeled box that lives in my car for half the year. Ice spikes. Hand warmers in the pockets of every fur. Wool-lined leggings in white that read like pantyhose in photographs. Slip-on dress shoes in sizes eight through eleven for when grandma's heels won't cross the rocks.
- A collection of capes and furs
- Faux furs, shampooed and dry-cleaned between weddings. Antique real furs from a private Russian collection if you want to wear something with a longer story. Most are for borrowing. If you fall in love with one in your photographs, it can be yours.
For warm weather
- The summer kit
- Cooling neck wraps. Gel packs that activate cold. A wasp-sting vial — without it, a single sting can wreck a photo shoot; with it, you can put a dab on, smile, and keep going.
For comfort
- Oxygen, for the canyon
- Small canisters. The South Rim sits at 7,000 feet and most people have no idea how thin the air is until they are already winded. Especially for elders, especially mid-ceremony. One every ten minutes makes the difference.
For safety
- A photographer who knows the canyon
- I work with photographers who can walk backwards on a cliff edge with a ladder and not flinch. Who know where sunrise and sunset will land in every season. Who follow the park's rules without being asked. If you bring your own photographer, I will want to interview them first.
Shapes of ceremony I have done before
These are starting points. Most ceremonies become hybrids of several. We will figure out the shape together.
- Standing ceremony
- The classic shape. Two people, vows, rings, witness, kiss.
- Ring blessing
- Each ring is held, named, and blessed before it is given. Useful when the rings carry family weight or when guests want to participate.
- Sage / smudging
- You sage each other before the vows. It clears the air; it gives your hands something to do while the emotion arrives.
- Blended-family ceremony
- Each child gets a ring on a chain. The other parent slips it over their neck. The kids feel the marriage too.
- Plain and beautiful
- Nothing spiritual at all. Just the words, said well, said for you.
Want a day shaped like this?
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